The universe + me

“It is a world of magic and mystery, of deep darkness and flickering starlight. It is a world where terrible things happen and wonderful things too. It is a world where goodness is pitted against evil, love against hate, order against chaos, in a great struggle where often it is hard to be sure who belongs to which side because appearances are endlessly deceptive. Yet for all its confusion and wildness, it is a world where the battle goes ultimately to the good, who live happily ever after, and where in the long run everybody good and evil alike, becomes known by his true name… That is the fairy tale of the Gospel with, of course, one crucial difference from all other fairy tales, which is that the claim made for it is true, that it only happened once upon a time, but has kept on happening ever since and is happening still.” -Frederick Buechner

The Truth About Meeting Someone At The Wrong Time

Thought Catalog

Timing is something that none of us can seem to get quite right with relationships. We meet the person of our dreams the month before they leave to go study abroad. We form an incredibly close friendship with an attractive person who is already taken. One relationship ends because our partner isn’t ready to get serious and another ends because they’re getting serious too soon.

“It would be perfect,” We moan to our friends, “If only this were five years from now/eight years sooner/some indistinct time in the future where all our problems would take care of themselves.” Timing seems to be the invariable third party in all of our relationships. And yet we never stop to consider why we let timing play such a drastic role in our lives.

Timing is a bitch, yes. But it’s only a bitch if we let it be. Here’s a simple truth…

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Reflections on All Saint’s Day and The Greater Love

Today is All Saint’s Day and it’s been a while since I’ve really written something here. No words can explain how life has exactly been since I’ve been back home from my own Missionary Year. I’ve definitely had my fair share of ups and downs, whirlwind of emotions from love, joy, happiness, and even hurt. The most hurt I’ve experienced since I lost my father 5 years ago on November 16. I guess it’s what made me decide to get back on here and write the words I can’t really say out loud. Some people may not understand, some people may be confused, some others will just have something to say whatever it may be. However, my writing leads me back to the roots of the months that lead to my Missionary Year and the life our Dear Father has allowed me to live. I keep forgetting the gaze of His eyes and that there is no other being except Him that I can run to who will love and accept me for who I am and for all the wrong I have done.

It has made me remember the lives of the Saints who had to carry their crosses and trials just as Christ bore our sins on the Cross all the way to Calvary. The Saints chose to live in the way that Christ lived, to lead a second life that was set apart from this world. They lived in the world, but not of the world – something we can really only strive to achieve. I have tried my best to lead that kind of life that would be set apart from the reality of this world and just really live in God’s love and mercy. My humanness however gets ahead of me and it takes over in a whole different perspective. The hurt and the pain of the human heart and all the experiences one has to go through suddenly blows up in your face and not knowing what to do. Then days like these suddenly come up and then you wonder how persevering the Saints were. In a world full of many temptations, confusion, hurt, and suffering, they still managed to get through the day, wake up the next day, take in another day of this world, then do it over and over again till they can finally share in the Glory of the Resurrection, the Glory of the Kingdom.

We have these Saints, the multitude of heavens to guide us through everything we experience (I mean duh, there’s a Saint for practically every intention and they are all up their cheering us on!) yet sometimes we forget to foster our relationship with them. I say this because for someone like me, one wouldn’t think that I’d still experience the things I go through each day. Some people have had to bear with my constant banter of emotions. For someone like me who is an introvert, yet can write something like for public viewing, well, its just the human in me. Every time I utter the words ‘I’m but only human,’ I hear my Mexican priest-spiritual director say congratulations because of the affirmation that I am human – we all are! The Saints were just like us! HUMAN! Then I suddenly recall in light of this fact, the frequently asked question to Catholics or even Christians in general – “why does God allow good people to suffer?” (This was something I recently reflected on and has been a constant theme whenever I give my reflections). It is because God wants us to remember that even His own Son, Jesus Christ who was innocent, FACT BEING: He is God himself, was brought down by His Father to be HUMAN. A human just like each and every one of us but this MAN who had suffer an infinite number of times more than we will ever experience in our own life times. It is through His example, having been beaten over and over for our sake, that drove the Saints to live the lives they have led that brought the holiness in their everyday. They walked with Jesus and allowed Him to lift them up when the moments got difficult. St. Ignatius himself once said, “If God sends you many suffering, it is certainly a sign that He wants to make you a great saint.” Indeed, yet some of us refute the fact that we can be saints because it seems unachievable. But as the saying goes, nothing is impossible with God.

I go back to the beginning of this post and to question why I am writing now after what seems to have been forever? For someone like me who, unfortunately can remember most events and conversations as if they had just recently happened, I have found so much suffering because of it. I have recently reflected and shared with a few friends that when I love, I love unconditionally, the kind of love that sometimes does not get returned. I never asked to be loved because God himself never asked for it. It is something He wants us to realize and feel on our own and then give it back when we are ready. I have been hurt and it hurts, and the pain is stronger because it comes at a time when we remember my own father (one of those memories I can remember vividly). I never questioned why God took him before us. I never had to question God because I knew my father gave all the love he could give and provide all the he could to give us this life. For someone who gives so much and remembers literally every moment of that love, care, and time you give, whatever form it may have been in, it hurts when others don’t realize it. Thus, as I dial this back down to the lives of the Saints and their own sufferings but at the same time, the joys they have experienced with the hope that they will one day join the Father in His Kingdom, I remember that the love was never worthless and that the memories though may hurt, are all a part of it. As Blessed Mother Teresa herself said, “I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love.” The hurt can actually lead us to only more love.

I guess I am merely counting down the days till the door will simply close, that the love I have given will have just been a distant memory, then maybe I can breathe. As long as the fact of God’s love is there, and that He will never leave me, I will be okay. “The Lord replied, “The times when you have seen only one set of footprints is when I carried you.” So when I forget and lose my way, I know that Christ will carry me. Just as the multitude of Saints constantly pray for us, we must never forget even if there are moments that hurt, they are lifting up all our pains to God.

19 Sobering Truths About Friendship You Need To Accept In Your 20s

Thought Catalog

1. The people who you thought would be there for you when it counted are not always going to be there. Sometimes because they quite literally cannot be there, other times because they just don’t want to (anymore).

2. The same will go for you – you’re not always going to (want to) be there for people who need you too.

3. Some of your friends will be more successful than you. And you will be more successful than some of your friends. And this will change over time depending on everyone’s life situation, path, and sheer dumb luck.

4. You will feel like people you’ve known for years don’t know you at all anymore (and you don’t know them either). You will also feel like people you’ve met for five minutes just “get you.” And it’ll be a strange, complex feeling you’re not quite sure how to handle all…

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16 Things I Want The Love Of My Life To Know

Thought Catalog

Screen Shot 2014-09-22 at 2.31.16 PM1. When people talk about their partners and spouses (future and current) they usually want them to know that it’s forever, no matter what. I want you to know that I don’t care about forever. I want you for as long as I’m meant to have you. I will love you every moment I’m able to because I’ll never pretend I have forever to do so.

2. You won’t always come first, but that doesn’t mean you’re not the most important person in my life. Real love isn’t about dropping everything in pursuit of one another, it’s about wanting to pay the bills and keep food on the table and save for the future and maintain your sanity so you can be wholly yourself. You don’t deserve less than that.

3. There’s really only one thing that matters, and it’s that every day we make the conscious choice to love each other. You teach me…

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To The One I Haven’t Met Yet

Thought Catalog

My mind tends to wander and ends up back on the thought of you more often than it should. I imagine the beat of your heart, the smell of your skin, the sound of your voice. I think about the way you laugh, the curve of your smile, all while thinking that I can’t wait to know you. 

I don’t know who you are yet. I might know your name, and I might know your face, but I don’t know you. I mean, the real you. The you who will tell me your hopes and dreams. The you who will trust me enough to share with me your biggest fears and toughest failures. The you that isn’t afraid to show emotion, the you that doesn’t feel the need to wear a mask with me. The you you’ve been holding back from everyone else, the you you’ve been waiting to share…

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7 Reasons Why You Should Travel Alone At Least Once In Your Life

Thought Catalog

1. You will meet amazing people.

While traveling with friends or a significant other can be a lot of fun, traveling solo for a certain amount of time can prove to be one of the most rewarding things you’ll ever do because of the great people you’ll meet.

When we travel with friends or a partner, we tend to stick to that little group of familiar faces and even though you’ll meet new people, the dynamics and interactions won’t be as deep and fulfilling. While you’re on your own on the road, you’re much more eager to meet travel buddies, team up with other travelers and generally reach out more in order to socialize.

2. The overwhelming sense of absolute freedom.

When you travel on your own and you start meeting people and making awesome friends, you’ll probably team up with travel buddies and end…

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Monogamy is unnatural

The Matt Walsh Blog

Monogamous marriages are unnatural. On this, I agree with the emailer below.

Now, behold these enlightening thoughts that I found in my inbox this morning:

Greetings Mr. Walsh,

I am a college professor, author, and researcher. It was obvious to me before you ever stated it that you are a man of little education and limited intelligence. Still, I commend your newfound fame and congratulate you on the enormous amounts of money you must be making.

[Five more sentences of insults and pretentious self-aggrandizement]

…You have become a hot topic in some of my classes and this very much worries me. It wasn’t until your name came up for a fifth time that I decided to investigate you. Your prose are rife with fallacies and Neanderthalic musings, so I could easily disembowel and discredit any part of it. But I’d like to concentrate on what seems to be your most common themes:…

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